Till Death Do Us Part

I first saw Roxy in a pet store inside The Woodlands mall.  I can't remember why I was there that day. I despise the mall and most forms of shopping. At the time, I was even having a hard time walking. Just a few weeks before I had back surgery, after rupturing two discs.  My right leg was mostly paralyzed. Still I found myself within feet of the pet store entrance and hobbled right on in. My usual quick in and out was altered, when a fox like fur baby caught my eye and my curiosity.  Being familiar with a great number of breeds, I was eager to learn more about this pumpkin colored puppy I could not place.

Yes, it was love at first sight, at least for me.  She was fast asleep, unaware that a strange woman was making decisions about her future. She was surely dreaming of suckling from her mother’s teat or maybe playing with the siblings she would never see again.

I found out very little from the pet store employee, just the breed and the required premium for immediate acquisition. Having had canine family members before, I realized this was a serious commitment. I needed more information.

My last such relationship was 13 years of ups and downs, although mostly ups, with Luke, aka, Boo Boo. He was a 2-year old Australian Cattle Dog that I found at the SPCA.  Given all the great problems of so many unwanted animals, I had always preferred rescuing to purchasing. Luke’s previous owner had trained him well. His breed is highly intelligent and also very loyal. It was very sad to lose him.

A puppy was going to be a challenge, so I left the pet dealer and went home to do some research. Most everything I learned about Roxy’s breed was positive, the most notable negative being heavy shedding. I may have just overlooked some other negatives, as most of us do when we think we are in love. For example, her lack of obedience, or to word it in a more pleasing light, her independence, which was much greater than I expected.

I also left a little up to fate, making myself wait an entire seven days before going back. If she were still available I would pay the fee and have her for my very own. If she were already taken, I would accept that it was not meant to be. Well, we all know how this story ends. I got the girl…

And there it was. I saw, I sought, I secured. Sounds simple, but relationships are complicated, even those with our four legged friends. 

The first photo of Roxy, "The Day I Fell In Love"

The relationships between humans contain so many variables. The consideration of a life long interdependent commitment needs to be entered into with great compassion, understanding and the knowledge that it ain't all shits and giggles. People, all people, are flawed.

Humans are complicated. There are egos to deal with. Pride gets in the way. The plethora of other emotions sometimes squeezes love out. Boundaries sometimes become blurry and other times become too narrow. People, who speak the same language, can't understand each other. Assumptions are made and communication starts to diminish. People take each other for granted.

These things happen, not only in romantic relationships, but also in friendships, business relationships, family ties and the relationships we form with our furry little friends. Many times, when we ourselves are mistaken about what has actually happened, we make a decision to break our own promises. We stop seeing the other as someone deserving of any effort. We stop giving. We start blaming.

There are of course times when it is absolutely necessary to run like hell in another direction. To get away from something or someone that is truly making your life unbearable, but even in those situations, when we look back, we might find something worthy of consideration.

Maybe I’m a slow learner. I still have issues, but then we all have issues.  I am learning more about this challenging virtue called commitment everyday. We should try to see one another in a more forgiving light. Illuminate what's right. Focus on the good. Overlook the petty, the superficial, but still give it all proper consideration.

Roxy is teaching me great lessons about commitment. That little bitch bit me yesterday.  It was an accident, but what I really need to look at, is how much of it was my fault. It can be hard to look in the mirror when something goes wrong, but more times than not, it is the last place we are willing to look.

I am going to try harder to be a better mother to my furry little pumpkin. For me, that means learning to say “No” and meaning it. She is my little love muffin. I made a commitment when I brought her home. For Roxy and I, it is, "Till Death Do Us Part."  Gosh, I hope she does not eat me in my sleep.